First to Third

A run on sports...

Friday, November 30, 2007

Bobby Knight Owns All

Many people are not big fans of Bob Knight... I am not one of those people. Dude fires me up, makes me laugh, and gives me something to talk about.

The following is the video of him hunting with his buddy, and a nearby resident not taking kindly to Bob Knight dropping pellets in his pool:


I have to agree with Bob on this one. He was doing nothing wrong and the house owner does not own all the land. He pointed out where he was shooting and he did not shoot in the direction of the dude's house.

The homeowner just wanted his 15 seconds of fame.

I am surprised Bob did not shoot the dude.

Labels: , , ,

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

When Is He Going To Develop?


Michael Jordan will always be remembered for his greatness on the court, but will also known for drafting Kwame Brown #1 overall in the 2001 NBA draft.

Sure, he still has years in him to play in the league but seeing him play every time he hits the court makes me cringe.

How did the Lakers give up Caron Butler for him? They gave up an all-star for Mr. Stone Hands.

And Phil Jackson wonders the same thing. Jackson has always questioned his work habits and physical toughness.

In today's fun, Jackson points out that he ignores Brown; as he should.
Jackson said center Kwame Brown might be able to return Dec. 9 against Golden State; Brown sprained his knee and ankle on Nov. 18 against Chicago. Jackson hasn't spoken to Brown about it, though.
"I kind of ignore him like he's a leper," said Jackson, who has questioned Brown's ability to play hurt in the past.

"Like he's a leper?"

Philip is a genius. Jordan was accused of breaking down Brown mentally and now Jackson is playing along as well. Brown is a bum. Being a Lakers fan I love watching him miss every rebound and pass that comes his way because of his well-designed hands.

Caron Butler for this dude... no wonder Kobe wants out of Los Angeles. Lakers' management know how make a deal.

Post script: He could not handle the rebound in this pic.

Labels: , , , , ,

Where Did They Go?

In this edition I bring you ex-NBA player Keon Clark. He last played in the 2003-2004 season with the Utah Jazz before he was traded to the Phoenix Suns who ultimately cut him thus ending his career.

I always liked the dude, partly because I thought he would have played well with the Shaq-Kobe Lakers teams who were always in search of a serviceable power forward/center.

And partly because he always had some great highlight dunks:


Well it looks as though Clark will now reside behind bars for a couple years after being arrested on a search warrant.
Clark, 32, of Danville, was scheduled for a hearing Monday in Vermilion County Circuit Court to decide whether he will serve his Vermilion County and Champaign County prison sentences at the same time or consecutively. That means Clark could serve either two-and-a-half years or five years in the Department of Corrections.

Clark was sentenced in absentia to two-and-a-half years in prison in both cases. The Champaign case was for driving under the influence, and the Vermilion case was for driving under the influence, possession of a controlled substance and not having a valid firearm owner's identification card.

It sucks that his off-court (rather in-court) issues led to his NBA demise. Clark is only 32 and I could point out several NBA teams that could use a big man on toothpick legs to dunk on people.

I will always remember your dunk on Bradley where you did not even touch the rim with your hand.

Holler Clark, get it together and come back to the league when you get out of the big house.

Labels: , , ,

Jimmy V Week

If you have gone to ESPN in the last couple of days you may have noticed a front page and banners promoting Jimmy V Week in honor of the great Jim Valvano's foundation in the research for cancer.

The following is his famous speech at the inaugural ESPY awards shortly before his death:


One of the greatest speeches ever. And it is kind of sickening that ESPN executives tried to cut it short by telling him he had 30 seconds left. No wonder they promote the hell out of it: because of guilt. Anyway, it is a good thing they promote it because it is for a good cause.

Every time I listen to that speech I have to hold back tears.

My grandmother has had cancer for the last 40 years and fights on. To this day she continues to work as much as you and I because she refuses to give in to the disease. She is a blessing to this world and would make Jimmy V come to tears.

When you have time, listen to the speech, it will move you to the emotions that he talks about.

Life is too precious and Jimmy V's speech will always be with us.

Labels: , , , ,

Happy Hump Day


So I started a new job last week, and to my surprise, no one told me, "happy hump day". I do not know if that is a good or bad thing.

I think the most someone knows about me is that I like the Lakers, and that is because I freaked about Kareem Abdul Jabbar having an office at our building.

Anyway, this week I bring you Brandi Padilla, wife of Boston Celtics star Kevin Garnett. Pretty, pretty girl.

And no, I do not hate Garnett, but his alien head took away from her pretty face in the picture. He is a baller though, and will be in the finals like I predicted. He deserves it, and his wife deserves some camera time on national TV.

Happy Wednesday.

Labels: , , , ,

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

El Wingador Is Coming Back


As some of you may know, I am a fan of competitive eating.

I used to do it for fun against no one in particular but to make my friends laugh and impress girls. Apparently I was wrong on the girls being impressed part.

I finally decided that $10 worth of food off the Wendy's dollar menu was no longer worth it after my six pack was lost and my wallet was getting thinner. Beer would be my competitive sport from now on.

I have digressed. Five-time wing champion Bill "El Wingador" Simmons is coming out of retirement.
Five-time Wing Bowl champ Bill "El Wingador" Simmons is coming out of retirement to try to regain his title against two-time winner Joey Chestnut, of San Jose, Calif. He better be training. Wingador's a sweet guy and a great eater, but Chestnut, who won this year's Nathan's Hot Dog Contest, is a stone-cold eating machine.

This is going to be epic... Dusty Rhodes El Wingador versus the "Kobayashi killer." SpikeTV better air this live. El Wingador, that name owns.

If Chestnut pulls this off, his next challenge should be against Richard LeFevre in both short-form pickled Jalapenos and Huevos Rancheros. LeFevre holds the current record for both and is lucky I do not competitive eat anymore or else I would hold those records.

A Mexican needs to hold those records and I am sad I can no longer compete.

Labels: , , , , ,

What A Liar


Remember this gentleman? I did some previous posts about his "protest" of the Arkansas Razorbacks football season because of the coaching staff, particularly Houston Nutt.

He promised to destroy the whole season, and he LIED. Where is the Mississippi State tickets video, Mr. Protester? He went to the game, I know it.

Mr. Protester probably figured that no one was listening to his protest and decided to go to the final home game. I hope the people sitting next to him poured beer for being an embarrassment to all the protesters around Arkansas.

And the bad part? He got to see Arkansas beat LSU last Saturday and Nutt left (and went to Ole Miss).

I hope you get paper cuts from your tickets next year.
Liar.

Labels: , , ,

Are You F'ing Kidding Me?


Yes, the paragraph alignment is probably messed up in this post, but look who is at fault. If you do not know then you either live in a cave in Mongolia, or you have been a hobo for the last decade (which even I doubt because hobos need self-fulfillment material too).

Adriana Lima has been my favorite supermodel for years now but I think she just lost that top spot to Alessandra Ambrosio.

The reason? Lima is dating this. Yes, that, Marko Jaric. An ex-Clipper and current Minnesota Timberwolve. The dude who averages 7.7 points to go with his 3.8 assists and 2.9 rebounds per game in his career.

Adriana, I can average more assists and rebounds per game. Probably not the points, but I would capture hearts on the court like Earl Boykins.

Teammate Mark Madsen spilled the beans on Jaric's relationship with Lima.

"Ever since he started dating Adriana Lima, he's a new man," Madsen said, laughing. "He's flying all over the court. He dunked! I've never seen him dunk."

Jaric, who scored a season-high 21 points Monday during the Wolves' 103-94 win, took the teasing in stride. Asked if the relationship is the reason why he's playing better, he smiled and said: "Maybe that's the thing, I don't know."

Teammate Antoine Walker didn't know Jaric is dating a supermodel but quipped: "He's overachieving."


For once in my life, I agree with the glutton Walker. According to the article, she even flew to Denver on Thanksgiving and attended the Wolves game the following day against the Nuggets.

What. The. Hell. She should have spent Thanksgiving with me; the chorizo stuffing would have floored her.

I just lost so much respect for this broad. Ugh.

(Source: Twincities.com)

Labels: , , , , ,

Carl Says So... The BCS Sucks



I am a big fan of Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and especially of Carl on the show. And if he says the BCS sucks, then you better listen. Oh wait, according to him it stands for "Boston Can Suck It," only a genius like Carl would think of that. I am stealing that.

Also, he hates Eli Manning.

Adult Swim

Labels: , , , , ,

Monday, November 26, 2007

Fishing...

For the next great posts. Sorry about being MIA.

Couple changes in my life took my free time away, but I promise to get this train rolling in a short time.

In the mean time, check out the video my cousin took of me flying a bee kite:


Hope your holiday was great, I know mine was as it lasted five days and included one broken liver.

Labels: , ,

Friday, November 16, 2007

NFL Week 11


The church of sports fan is upon us and lets hope I can pick some winners this week after all the upsets last week.

For the rest of the season I will be rooting for the San Francisco 49ers because the New England Patriots own the rights to their first round pick in next year's draft. The rich keep getting richer.

Indianapolis and Pittsburgh are now in a dogfight for the second best record in the AFC because the Patriots are clearly not losing anytime soon (especially after drunk '72 Dolphins motivate them).

While in the NFC, Dallas and Green Bay are duking it out for the best record.

Picks:

Tampa Bay Bucs @ Atlanta Falcons - The Bucs are coming off a bye week and looking to keep their first place spot in the NFC South with Carolina and New Orleans not far behind. Joey Harrington sucks. Tampa Bay.

Cleveland Browns @ Baltimore Ravens - Nice divisional matchup between AFC North opponents with Kyle Boller getting the start for the Ravens. Last week he could not throw the ball 3 yards while warming up on the sidelines - did anyone else catch that clip? Anyway, Derek Anderson owns because he is on my fantasy team. Cleveland.

Arizona Cardinals @ Cincinnati Bengals - Amazingly, the Cardinals are still alive in their division, but then again they play in the NFC Worst. The Bengals like jail. Cincinnati.

Carolina Panthers @ Green Bay Packers - Did you know? If Vinny Testaverde starts opposite of Brett Favre, they will combine for the oldest age among two starting QBs in NFL history. Panthers are 9.5 point dogs, but have a good road record. Betting man, take the Panthers to cover. Green Bay.

New Orleans Saints @ Houston Texans - New Orleans laid an egg last week by losing to the winless Rams. The Texans will have Andre Johnson and Matt Schaub back. The Saints will rebound. Betting man, take the Saints as they are 1.5 point dogs. New Orleans.

Kansas City Chiefs @ Indianapolis Colts - "The Colts are done." That is all I have heard. Yes they lost Dwight Freeney, and Marvin Harrison is still out but Dallas Clark will be back to help Peyton Manning avoid 6 INTs this week. Chiefs are without Larry Johnson and will start QB Brodie Croyle (his wife is hot. Indianapolis.

San Diego Chargers @ Jacksonville Jaguars - Phillip Rivers sucks and will not be bailed out by six interceptions by the opposing QB this week. Maurice Jones-Drew is a human cannonball and went to UCLA. Jacksonville.

Oakland Raiders @ Minnesota Vikings - If this game was in Oakland I would pick the Raiders. And they are not starting JaMarcus Russell. Wait, wait. I remember what Daunte Culpepper did to Miami when he faced them. Oakland.

Philadelphia Eagles @ Miami Dolphins - Suck it '72 Dolphins. You should keep your mouths shut if you know what is good for your perfect season. Philadelphia.

New York Giants @ Detroit Lions - This is a tough one. Just when I think Eli has it all together he decides to resort to his old ways. The Lions are perfect at home this season. Detroit.

Pittsburgh Steelers @ New York Jets - No need to explain. Betting man take the Steelers as the 9.5 point favorite. Pittsburgh.

Washington Redskins @ Dallas Cowboys - Cowboys at home is an easy pick, especially against a divisional foe. Betting man they will cover the points as well. Dallas.

St. Louis Rams @ San Francisco 49ers - This week's suck off. Trent Dilfer will get the start over Alex Smith. Rams woke up for a game last week and will be able to score more than the Niners. St. Louis.

Chicago Bears @ Seattle Seahawks - I almost caught myself typing that the Bears will react positively to Rex Grossman getting the start, but then my fingernails began to throw up. Seattle.

New England Patriots @ Buffalo Bills - Betting man take the 16 point-favored Pats. New England.

Tennessee Titans @ Denver Broncos - Vince Young on a Monday night? Expect a decent game out of the kid, dare I say a fantasy football worthy performance. Tennessee.

Week 10 record: 5-9
Overall (started week 3): 63-49

I end this NFL picks edition with Randy Marsh making moves on Guitar Hero 3 like I do:

Labels: , , , , , ,

Rocky The Musical


It looks like I will be making my first trip to a musical in the near future as a Rocky musical is in the early stages of development based on the first movie.
A musical Rocky, now in development, will have a libretto by Tony Award winner Meehan (who penned the books to Annie, The Producers and Young Frankenstein) and songs by the Tony Award-winning team of lyricist Lynn Ahrens and composer Stephen Flaherty (Ragtime and the current Lincoln Center attraction, The Glorious Ones), the writer told Playbill.com columnist Harry Haun.

"It was made to be a musical," Meehan said. It's got all the elements."

This is an excellent idea. Who wants to see a broadway production of Legally Blonde when you can see Rocky Balboa singing while he takes punches from Apollo Creed?

Unfortunately Sylvester Stallone will not be involved, but he gave his blessings for the project.

Labels: , , , , , ,

Definition Of Heart

We always hear professional athletes throw around the word "warrior" when talking about themselves. Sometimes it is true because the player using that word has a lot of heart (Kevin Garnett), others use it loosely and should call themselves "paycheck collectors" (Shaquille O'Neal as of late).

The following video is tough to watch, but the girl that it involves is tough as nails. It is of the Ohio state high school cross country championship, and at the 1:39 mark you will see Berkshire high senior Claire Markwardt put on a display of heart like you have never seen (she is the blonde, and you cannot miss her after that mark... no need to watch the full 7 minutes):

Markwardt broke her tibia in multiple places and fibula in half right as she was about to cross the finish line. Unable to continue on two feet, she crawled the final 45 feet knowing that this was her last race in high school, and how much of an honor it was to be in the state championship.

Heart. Determination. Pride. Courage.
One of Markwardt's teammates, unaware of what had happened, encouraged her to get up. She tried, using her right leg. But as soon as she shifted weight to the left, the loudest crack yet came. And her leg gave out again.

"At that point, I knew what had happened. I knew my leg was broken pretty badly. And I knew I couldn't get up again. So I started crawling," she said.

She said she thought not of her coach, nor her parents, nor anyone else who had encouraged her to never give up, to see things to the finish. Instead, she thought of the countless stories she had heard about runners who collapsed before a race's end and somehow found the courage to cross that last line. Even if her leg had given out at the 400-meter mark, she said, it wouldn't have mattered. She was going to finish.

"They may not have let me, and it might not have been pretty, but I would have tried," she said.

"I had come so far. Our team had come so far. All season, we had been working for state, and now we were there. I was almost done, and there was no way I was going to let the team down."

It would have been so easy for her to roll over and cry in pain. But no, she wanted to finish what she started, not only for her but for her teammates.

Poor girl missed her sister's wedding that night in which she was the maid of honor. Instead of feeling sorry for herself, she called her sister crying with an apology for not being there. Not necessary her sister said.

She will spend time on crutches and doing rehabilitation, and will be able to run again in six months.

Her mother suggested that she use a wheelchair to get around for her classes to which she replied:
"I haven't used the wheelchair since I was in the hospital that day. I'm fine on crutches. I'm not going to school in a wheelchair. I'm fighting that wheelchair off."

True warrior indeed.

You can read more on the story here.

Labels: , , , , ,

It Is All A Conspiracy

Why? Why do the former '72 Dolphins players keep opening their mouths daring the Patriots to go 19-0 this year?

In this edition we have running back Mercury Morris from the '72 Dolphins talking about the Pats this season:

"They're comparing them [the Patriots] to a 17-0 team? If they were 17-0, but I think they are like 10 games short right now, right? They got 10 more icebergs to go through in this titanic trip that they're talking about. So far nobody's made it across their except us! So we're over docked here waiting on ya!"

"Right now, they haven't done that. Don't call me when you're in my town. Call me when you're on my block and I see ya next door when you're moving your furniture in. That's when I know you're going to the championship to play. And if you win it I'll be dressed up in a tuxedo waiting on my bride."

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. I am not blaming this on Morris, I blame ESPN. It is a conspiracy. They want a Boston year. How the hell did this interview come about?

In the morning roundtable of ESPN: "So far we couldn't get any comments this week from some of the '72 Dolphins, but I heard Mercury Morris is throwing a couple of brews back on the golf course today. Lets get a team there, wait until he has a 6er in him, then put the microphone in his face."

Doesn't ESPN have better things to cover? Immediately after this interview was shot I guarantee the video was sent to an ESPN reporter in Foxboro and shown to all the Patriots players.

I beg you '72 Dolphins, please keep your mouth shut... these Pats do not need any more motivation.

Labels: , , , , , ,

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Herschel Walker v. Stever Spurrier


South Carolina coach Steve Spurrier has been challenged to a fight by Herschel Walker, and he wants no part of it.
"How much guts do you have?" Walker said. "Step in a ring with me, and then we'll see."

As he was read Herschel Walker's physical challenge to him, a smile crept across Steve Spurrier's face.

"And you expect me to respond to that?" the South Carolina coach asked a couple of reporters Wednesday night. "And y'all actually listen to that?"

The challenge from Walker comes after Spurrier said that he would've sent a "third-team guy in there to wrestle with" Georgia players to induce suspensions. He made that comment in response to Georgia players' celebration after a touchdown against Florida last month.

Spurrier later said he was joking, but Walker, a former Georgia Bulldog, did not find it funny.

Come on Walker, you know you do not pick fights with the little guys if you are your size. Look at me, why do you think I never get into fights? No one wants to brag about beating up a little guy.

Spurrier getting into the ring with Walker would be like me getting into the ring with Kimbo:

Labels: , , , ,

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Dallas Cowboys On 'Roids?


This might be hearsay, but a Plano trainer is claiming that he supplied Cowboys players with steroids, both current and former.

From The Dallas Morning News:
A man who pleaded guilty Tuesday to possession of illegal steroids has given federal authorities the names of former and current Dallas Cowboys players who he says he supplied with performance-enhancing drugs, according to sources familiar with the investigation.

David Jacobs, 35, has not publicly named any of the players he says he has supplied with drugs. None of his claims has been publicly verified, and no evidence has been released related to the involvement of the athletes.

The Cowboys claim to have no knowledge of Jacobs, and that might be true. He may just be trying to bring down anyone he can with him, or he might be telling the truth. I say it is the latter.

I just want to make sure that Cowboy-haters have as much ammunition as possible because the whole "Tony Homo" gets old after awhile.

The whole steroids allegations in sports are getting ugly. Every week more performance-enhancing drugs busts are happening, and accusations are coming out against players in the professional leagues.

But we have to live with it in the sports world. Shoot, we even have ex-NFL players admitting to the use of them on the radio waves like Mike Golic did on ESPN radio. I cannot say anything bad about Golic though because I actually like the dude.

I shot up before. Really, I am serious. Look how big I am. I have the scars on my butt to prove it.

Labels: , , , , ,

Green Bay Fan Too Lazy To Buy Nuts


This story has the internet going nuts like Paul Wall, so I decided I should join in on the fun.

The above picture is from Sunday's game when Green Bay Packers receiver Ruvell Martin made the leap to join the Lambeau faithful after scoring in the game against the Minnesota Vikings on Sunday. Radio station 620AM WTMJ is now asking that the man that grabbed Martin's junk be tracked down.

I knew the Packers fans were passionate, but damn.

From the radio station's website:
The guy in the white at the far right literally left a mark on the Packers wideout. Donald Driver, during his regular Greenhouse segment on Newsradio 620 WTMJ said what happened to Ruvell "just ain't right" and that it's the talk of the lockerroom. We know this was a Milwaukee season ticket "holder" game, so chances are this guy's i-d will be known to us.

Poor dude, hope it was worth it, pervert. He will never be able to sit in those seats again once he is ID'ed. I like how he is trying to play it off by patting Martin on the helmet, "no, no... I was just trying to make sure I got to touch his helmet."

Next time call the peanut dude if you want some nuts.

Labels: , , , ,

Brokeback Mountain Defense


Phil Jackson took some heat from the NBA after his postgame remarks compared the Lakers defense to Brokeback Mountain.
"We call this a 'Brokeback Mountain' game, because there's so much penetration and kickouts," Jackson said. "It was one of those games."

The reporters, including John "Peanut-Head" Ireland who asked the question that prompted the remark, immediately started laughing at statement.

I would have made the same comment had my team let Cal State Fullerton alum Bruce Bowen hit six 3-pointers against them. How does that guy outscore Kobe Bryant?

The league did not fine Jackson over the comments, but issued a statement that the Lakers assured them that further remarks like that would not happen.

Of course, the Gay & Lesbian Against Defamation immediately released a statement:
"Phil Jackson's been coaching long enough that he should be able to talk about the Lakers' performance without resorting to cheap gay jokes," the statement read.

Jackson is probably the only coach in the NBA that can get away with a comment like that with just a slap on the hand. He plays mind games with all of the league, and just sits back and smiles at the results.

I would be intimidated to sit down to dinner with the dude. He could probably get me to think that I am a hyena and belong in the Carbon Canyon hills.

*UPDATE: The fact that ESPN blew this out of proportion prompted Phil Jackson to issue a video apology. The best part was that Jackson was pretty much sarcastic, basically saying "Eff you ESPN for even making this a story." He did not apologize to homosexuals directly, but to "Texas, cowboys, or anyone this has affected."

Jackson is classic. He just made fun of all of Texas in that apology. Genius.

Labels: , , , ,

Young NHL Players Are Naive


Toronto Maple Leafs rookie winger, Jiri Tlusty had his dong all over the internet for the past week, after naked images hit the internet on the isthishappening.com website.
Tlusty, the once-hot Leafs callup, is suddenly the centre of hockey attention after naked photos appeared on the Canadian gossip website isthishappening.com late last week.

The photos were actually shot by Tlusty, according to his lawyer, Jerome R. Morse.

"Mr. Tlusty took these photographs of himself with his camera phone last year," Morse wrote in an letter, e-mailed to Zack Taylor of isthishappening.com. "As such, Mr. Tlusty is the owner of these photographs and any unauthorized publication of these photographs is a violation of his copy-right."

The photos were taken off of the website, but can probably be found on the internet... anything can, but I am not looking for a naked picture of a dude. Ladies, get to work.

Later, Tlusty issued an email responding to the picture in which he said: "I feel like s--t right now."

The picture was circulated around the internet after he sent the original to a female he met online. He took them before the season started, but after he was drafted in 2006.

What was he doing pimping girls online? What was he using, adultfriendfinder.com? Athletes are naive in that they think they can take pictures without the worries of them ending up online. Just ask Oscar De La Hoya.

Read more about the story here.

Labels: , , , ,

Goodbye Street Cred


Brooklyn-raised Stephon Marbury went AWOL from the New York Knicks for Tuesday's game against the Phoenix and it is unclear whether he will be at the game in Los Angeles against the Clippers today.

Not only that, but Marbury said that he would dish out secrets about coach Isiah Thomas if he did not start against the Suns.
"Isiah has to start me," Marbury fumed, according to the source. "I've got so much (stuff) on Isiah and he knows it. He thinks he can (get) me. But I'll (get) him first. You have no idea what I know."

Well Marbury, dish. You did not show up for the game, meaning you did not start. So dish, because thats the last thing you do on the basketball court. Oh snap!

Marbury better watch himself, because this will not only ruin his career on the court, but his street cred will go out the door. The Brooklyn kid would be looked at as a rat, not good. Remember when Kobe Bryant snitched on Shaquille O'Neal about paying off women? That raised a lot of eyebrows of NBA players.

It ruins any trust you have in a locker room, and all trust outside.

The Knicks organization needs to get rid of Marbury and Thomas. And Spike Lee needs to buy the team from James Dolan. Marbury, Thomas, and Dolan have killed this team, and are the other three-headed monster in the Eastern Conference, literally.

Marbury is supposedly in Los Angeles for the game tonight and has said it is up to Thomas whether he plays.

Exactly how does Isiah still have a job in the NBA? Everywhere he has gone he has done a horrible job. He should stick to being Karl Malone's elbow target. (Sorry, no video evidence of that blow in 1991, but if you are a NBA fan then you know what I am talking about.)

What about this idea? Bring back Patrick Ewing to coach the Knicks, get Latrell Sprewell out of retirement, and sign Earl Boykins. Bada bing, you got yourself new life in the Madison Square Garden.

Labels: , , , , , , ,

Happy Hump Day!


It is my favorite office saying day, Wednesday, otherwise known as "happy hump day" to those lurkers who stand by your desk for more than 10 minutes trying to talk to you.

Today I bring you Danielle Gamba, former Raiderette for the Oakland Raiders. No, she does not currently date a professional sports player (that I know of), but she has been linked to Oakland A's Nick Swisher. Does it matter though, she is gorgeous.

Her freckles are mesmerizing, I could lose myself in them. I would give up my shoe collection, dvd collection, and Nintendo Wii for a date with this lovely lady. If you know me, that is a lot.

Anyway, she was let go by the Raiders because they found out she had done nude modeling, which you can take a gander at here.

Happy Wednesday!

Labels: , , , , ,

Senior Citizens = Golf Course "Leeches"


According to the British Golf Club Secretary Newletter, senior citizens are ruining golf courses and the experiences of the younger golfers deeming them as "leeches."
Many elderly players, who pay reduced fees, spend more than half their week playing, ruining courses and annoying younger members who often pay a lot more for membership, says The Golf Club Secretary Newsletter.

Now clubs are considering banning elderly players at certain times and dropping concessionary rates.

Damn, there is no way the golf clubs win this one. Seniors are stubborn and will make sure they win, especially involving their second religion, golf.

The seniors will produce a public outcry making sure that the prices are not run up and their time on the golf course is not shortened. But I may be wrong, as I live in America and do not know the culture of senior citizens in the UK.

I cannot believe that the newsletter calls them "leeches," classic. Sure, they may be on the course a lot, but they use a golf course that is otherwise unoccupied because the younger players are at work.

Once the senior citizens are aware of the golf clubs that agree with the sentiment made by the newsletter they will really show them how to milk a golf course. I would love to see seniors ditch the golf carts to walk the full 18-hole course while getting tanked on Miller's High Life suds.

Labels: , , , ,

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Vote For America's Sexiest Sportscaster


Playboy has the second installment of their "America's Sexiest Sportscaster" poll on their website and they are asking America to vote on your favorite babe on the sidelines or in the studio.

This is a tough vote. Pictured here is Jamie Little, who I knew nothing about so I did some image research on her. At first I immediately thought Shana Hiatt should get my vote, but she gets negative points for being married (actually those negative points disappear because she posed for Playboy, that you can view here).

Erin Andrews is as cute as a kitten playing on a naked girl (yes, I have seen this...in a drawing). She has a body that could melt snow in a blizzard.

There is the local girl of southern California in Lindsay Soto, as I get to see her following Lakers and Angels games. She looks too innocent though, so I cannot give her my vote. Points for working with Rex Hudler in the studio though, that must trip her out. Dude acts like he is on the hippie lettuce all the time.

And then there is Rachel Nichols. I remember when I first saw her on ESPN and thinking to myself, "damn, who is that? I normally do not like redheads, but this girl makes funny things happen in my pants." I thought she would not last long with ESPN, but she has been a mainstay and my eyes could not be happier. Negative points for being married, and the way she says, "Rachels Nichols in (wherever she is reporting from)... ESPN," is really annoying. I think it is the way in which she moves her lips, weird.

Jeanne Zelasko is a milf. I remember hearing her on the radio in my area, then saw her on TV and thought it was a shame that they kept her in a radio booth for all those years. Her hair is sometimes crazy during the MLB postgame shows and is pretty boring on air. She is married to Curt Sandoval, a local sports reporter here in the Los Angeles area.

The other ladies are not really my style.

Colleen Dominguez sometimes turns me on... but she has that look to her, you know, that one that says, "don't you dare eff with me." I think she would beat me up in the bedroom.

Hazel Mae gets an automatic disqualification because she works for the New England Sports Network and covers the Boston Red Sox. Gross.

The past candidates are not eligible so that is why you do not see the following on the list: Bonnie Bernstein, Summer Sanders, or Lisa Guerrero.

Why was Suzy Kolber left off the list? She is cute as hell, and Joe Namath gives her the vote of confidence (even if he was drunk):


I used to have a thing for Cindy Brunson from ESPN, but she cut her hair and ruined it for me. It was weird; she used to rock her hair down and then she started always wearing it up. Then one day, it was all gone. Goodbye tingly feeling in my pants. I swear ESPN made her do it because the other female anchors were getting jealous.

Linda Cohn, don't fret, I love you.

Labels: , , , , , , ,

Monday, November 12, 2007

Goodbye NFL Week 10


Week 10 of the NFL season has officially come and gone after the Seattle Seahawks took care of the San Francisco 49ers in a 24-0 win. It was the Niners seventh straight loss after winning their first two games.

I am not going to lie, I watched about 1 minute of this game because the UCLA basketball came on and I never looked back. Kevin Love is the man... Anyway, the 49ers were only able to manage 173 yards of offense against the Seahawks.

I do not know how much longer Alex Smith will be playing starting this season, but damn, poor dude is having a bad season. He has only 2 TDs in the six games he has played in (I am not counting a game when he played briefly).

The Seahawks are in first place of the NFC Worst West.

I did not get to see as many games this week because I was eating/drinking at Qualcomm Stadium parking lot in anticipation of Peyton Manning throwing a Colts record 6 interceptions.

What did catch in the parking lot was a combination of the Cowboys/Giants and the Bears/Raiders games. The Raiders game was just ugly to watch, and you know it is bad when Rex Grossman comes into the game to be the hero. And what the hell was with the Giants pass coverage, mainly on Terrell Owens. Dude tore them up. As much as it pains me to say it, he is having a great year. He made the Giants look silly.

Quick hits: The Falcons won their second straight game after a game-winning TD was thrown by Joey Harrington to defeat the Panthers. Like I predicted, Donovan McNabb pulled a Donovan McNabb by having a great game to propel the Eagles over the Redskins. The Jaguars avenged a week 1 loss to the Titans to move into a tie for second place in the AFC South. Cleveland needs to learn how to close games, especially against division rivals, as the Steelers rallied for a big victory. The Vikings took a big blow by losing Adrian Peterson in a 34-0 loss to the now 60,000-passing-yards-Brett Favre and the Packers. Steve McNair had three turnovers all by himself, and Shayne Graham kicked a Bengals record 7 FGs in their win. Miami almost won their first game, but decided it would be cool to continue to be winless, so they lost to the Bills. Denver won for the first time since 2002 in Kansas City. The Lions layed an egg and were upset by the Cardinals.

Stink team of the week: New Orleans did not play like a team on a four-game winning streak, as they were upset by a winless St. Louis Rams team. They were jammed 37-29. The Rams scored 34 unanswered points after the Saints scored on their opening drive.

My picks were atrocious, as the upsets made me look stupid (or maybe I really am).
This week's record: 5-9 (ouch)
Overall record: 63-49

*Side note: I just put two pieces of Dubble Bubble in my mouth and now my jaw is killing me. I do not know how Terry Francona chews the Dubble Bubble like crazy.*

Labels: , , , , ,

Alex Rodriguez Greed Song


I do not know if you enjoy Ryan Parker's songs on YouTube, but I do, so I am posting them.

This one is about A-Rod's upcoming contract that you might have heard about. I would love to have A-Rod on my baseball team, but it is crazy money that he and Scott Boras are asking for especially since the man owns no rings. Zero rings and he wants $30 million a year.

Battle of Los Angeles. Angels, then my season seats pricing goes up.

Labels: , , , ,

Evil Empire - Veteran's Day Edition


In honor of Veteran's Day being observed today, I would like to bring to your attention that the new "evil empire" (aka Boston teams, in this case the New England Patriots), stiffed Iraq War veterans yesterday.

From the Boston Herald:
Hundreds of hopeful Iraq War veterans and their families had their hearts broken on Veterans Day when their heroes, the New England Patriots, were MIA at a Gillette Stadium luncheon billed as a Patriots tribute to the National Guardsmen’s bravery and sacrifice.

“We were told that the Patriots were going to be there - that’s why we brought our families,” said Sgt. Sean Morrison, who returned from his second year-long tour in Iraq in September. “All the soldiers showed up in uniform and their families were in Patriots gear waiting for the Pats to show up.”

To the Patriots defense it was a miscommunication between the front office and the team. They were not told they were expected to attend the event.

But do not let them off so easy. At your workplace don't you know everything that is going on in the office? Like knowing when you are expecting visitors from another company, customer, etc.?

So why wouldn't the Pats know about the event and that it originally said that some players would be there to meet and greet the veterans.
Sgt. First Class Daniel Saulnier drove to the Foxboro luncheon from North Reading.

“I brought my wife, her sister and my brother,” he said. “It was basically a waste of time to even go there. The whole reason to go was to see the Patriots. Yeah, there was a free meal and two cheerleaders and one Super Bowl ring instead of three rings but there was absolutely no Patriots.”

Saulnier said the crowd was upset.

“A lot of us brought stuff to be signed by the Patriots,” he said. “Kids brought hats, jerseys, and footballs. They lugged all that stuff in for nothing. It was real depressing. It was just a disappointment all across the board.”

Yes. Yes. Hate the Patriots more. Wait, not such a good idea.

Those guys are really going to put the pounding on some teams if people are aware of this story and it comes out into the national media in a negative way.

Forget that you read this, it never happened. Do not tell a veteran, friend, family member, anyone.

The Pats will probably read the story in the Herald and dedicate the rest of the season to the soldiers, meaning they have another reason to kill everyone in the NFL.

You sly little dogs, Boston Herald. Creating more motivation for Bill Belichick and Co. in your local media.

Labels: , , , , ,

Ugh. Boston.


The only Boston-based major sports team that is not having outstanding success right now is the Boston Bruins, and Ryan Parker has a song in honor of them.

The Red Sox, Celtics, Patriots and even MLS team, Revolution, are at the top of their leagues right now. What the hell. And the fans are like Kyle's dad from South Park when he gets a hybrid car.

Here is a trailer of "Smug Alert":


I actually overheard a dude wearing a Patriots hat sitting several barstools over from me say that he was not a Red Sox fan. What the hell! If you like one, you like all. There is no mixing when it comes to Boston teams. He kept on looking over at me since I was wearing a Colts jersey, probably trying to get me to argue with him about the Pats. Instead I focused on my Marlboro Lights, Newcastle beers, and the lady that was sitting with a group of not-me's in a booth.

Boston fans: you cannot avoid the smug if you only like one Boston team.

Lets just get this year over with so we can move on.

Labels: , , , ,

Damn That Was Ugly


Yesterday was not a good day for Mr. Peyton Manning. A NFL team should not have a shot in hell to win a game any time a quarterback throws six INTs.

But somehow, the Colts had the opportunity to take a one-point lead with 1:31 left in the game with Adam Matthew Vinatieri lining up for a field goal. One of the most clutch field goal kickers then found a way to kick the 29-yard chip shot wide right. Game over. Or not.

Manning still had a chance to make a miracle run down the field after the Colts held the San Diego Chargers to a three-and-out. But with no timeouts and average receivers on the field, Manning had no choice but to throw it to a Chargers player instead, for his sixth interception.

Chargers win, 23-21.

The Chargers played well in the first half, mainly special teams and their defense. Philip Rivers had a below average game, throwing for 104 yards, two interceptions and zero TDs.

They did not score a point in the second half and were primed to be caught by the Colts.

Unfortunately for Manning, the Chargers defense shut down Joseph Addai and the Colts run game, so he had to throw for much of the day. Never a bad thing for Manning, but he was without three consistent receivers: Dallas Clark, Marvin Harrison, and Anthony Gonzalez.

Manning got to throw to Bryan Fletcher, Ben Utecht, Aaron Moorehead, and Craphonso Thorpe. Yesterday was Thorpe's first NFL catch in his career. Yes, Manning had Reggie Wayne as well, but one receiver can only do so much while being double covered.

Just makes you realize that a quarterback does not make a team. Manning was lost without his normal receivers. He had to acquaint himself to the receivers during the game and looked like his little brother on the day. Okay, that was an unjustified shot, as Eli is not that bad, but Peyton did not look like Peyton the day.

Tom Brady is on fire this year because he has a 21-year-old version of Randy Moss, Wes Welker, and Donte Stallworth to throw to. Last year he had the dude with the bugged out eyes in Reche Caldwell (side note: I forgot dude's name so I googled "bug eyed patriots receiver" and his name came up immediately, classic).

I say the Colts win last night's game if they had Dallas Clark playing in the game. There were ugly dropped passes that could have changed the game.

It was my first NFL game that I have attended and could not have asked for a better time. Tailgating for a good five hours (albondigas, carne asada, rib eye, coors light), train ride, and got heckled a little.

You know how the camera shakes during the television broadcast when the crowd is going nuts? Well, that is the realness, as I felt that going through my body when the crowd was trying to make Manning and Co. deaf.

Weekly NFL wrap up coming after tonight's MNF great matchup of the San Francisco 49ers and Seattle Seahawks.

Labels: , , , ,

Friday, November 9, 2007

NFL Week 10 Picks


The weekend is upon us and it is time to start thinking about Sunday. There are some good games this week with Dallas visiting New York and Denver taking on Kansas City.

The main attraction? It has personal value to me because it will be the first NFL game that I have ever attended. Indianapolis Colts @ San Diego Chargers, NBC's Sunday night game. It should be a good game with both teams coming off disappointing losses.

Picks:

Atlanta Falcons @ Carolina Panthers - The Falcons are winless on the road, and the Panthers are winless at home. Vinny Testaverde will probably start and that, as weird as it is to say this, is a good thing. UCLA alumn DeShaun Foster should have a good game because he has averaged 110+ yards/game against the Falcons in his career. Carolina.

Minnesota Vikings @ Green Bay Packers - Green Bay is the real deal, and will have to do something that the Chargers could not, stop Adrian Peterson. I am skeptical of the Packers running game but I think Brett Favre has magic about him this season. Green Bay.

Denver Broncos @ Kansas City Chiefs - The Broncos looked awful last week against the Lions. Larry Johnson is out this week, but the fact that they may have sole possession of first place in the AFC West at the end of the day will motivate them enough. Plus, the Broncos could not stop me if I was running against them. Kansas City.

Buffalo Bills @ Miami Dolphins - Miami has a chance to get their first win this week. They are coming off their bye week and will be playing at home. Still, I want to see that perfect season. Buffalo.

St. Louis Rams @ New Orleans Saints - Come on. I feel bad for Rams fans (which includes many of my family members), just an ugly year. Colston will have 2 TDs on the day. New Orleans.

Cleveland Browns @ Pittsburgh Steelers - Cleveland can tie the Steelers for first place in the AFC North with a win this week. Yes, I am saying that in November. If this game was in Cleveland I would take the Browns no problem. But the Steelers are at home and their defense is better than that of the Browns. Betting man take the Browns because the Steelers are 9 1/2 point favorites. Pittsburgh.

Jacksonville Jaguars @ Tennessee Titans - I do not know what is up with the Jaguars, they are giving up yards like crazy lately. Tennessee in a nice divisional matchup. Tennessee.

Philadelphia Eagles @ Washington Redskins - The Redskins are looking to keep their playoff hopes alive, while Donovan McNabb and the Eagles are wondering where to eat after the game. Of course, McNabb can pull a McNabb and have a monster game all of a sudden. Washington.

Cincinnati Bengals @ Baltimore Ravens - The Bengals are a damn mess. They are one of those teams that you just look at and ask yourself, "WTF are they thinking?" Funny quote I read in an article this week, "When the Ravens want to throw it deep, they go to Steve McNair. He averages 5.5 yards per completion. When they want to keep it short, they go to Kyle Boller, who averages 5.4." Classic. Baltimore.

Detroit Lions @ Arizona Cardinals - This could be a dangerous game for the Lions who are coming off a blowout against the Broncos. Still, they find a way to win. Detroit.

Dallas Cowboys @ New York Giants - They played an entertaining game against each other in week 1 with the Cowboys winning. But this is a better Giants team than what the Cowboys saw early. Romo is going to have to be on the move because the Giants defensive line is solid. New York.

Chicago Bears @ Oakland Raiders - I am not picking the Raiders until they start playing JaMarcus Russell. It certainly would not hurt their chances or season. Chicago.

Indianapolis Colts @ San Diego Chargers - The Chargers are going to be pumped up for this one, coming off an ugly loss and this week playing during primetime. The Colts may have a hangover from their tough loss to the Patriots, but think they will bounce back. Peyton will be able to throw all over the field. Joseph Addai owns all. Indianapolis.

San Francisco @ Seattle Seahawks - Damn. Could ESPN have picked a better game for Monday night? This stinker is going to be hard for me to watch. Poor Niners fans, it looked so bright after the 2-0 start, but now have lost 6 straight. Johnnie Walker, say hello to your little friend. Seattle.

Countdown until I head to Oakland to watch the Colts play: 36 days. Percentage of chance that I will rock Colts gear: 0%.

Last week's record: 7-7.
Overall record: 58-40.

Labels: , , , ,

Friday Night Fights

It is on tonight. Well, not really. Unless we are talking my hand fighting with the bottle to keep it from my mouth.

As I do my picks for the NFL this weekend, here are a couple of good NHL fights I found this week...

Eric Boulton v. Chris Neil from November 1, 2007:

Damn good fight. I do not know what Neil was doing at by raising his free arm; either calling for the refs, pumping up the crowd, or mocking Boulton. Your call. I think he was mocking Boulton for spinning him around. Draw.

DJ King v. Derek Boogaard from November 1, 2007:

I give the decision to Boogaard based on the fact that he did not have his gloves off until after King was already throwing punches. His final round flurry of punches won him the fight. Damn I love the NHL. Where else are you going to have their height and weight flash across the screen on the game telecast after a fight?

Labels: , ,

Dallas Got Their Revenge

For one night. I guess. The Dallas Mavericks beat the Golden State Warriors 120-115 at the Oracle Arena. The Warriors are winless this year, but are still fun to watch, especially against the Mavs.

The Mavs had to play the role of "this win does not mean anything," but you know they wanted to go in there and jam the Warriors. It was in their body language. The Mavs players were jawing with the Warriors and fouling a little harder than normal. All I know is that Baron Davis is a baller. Too bad he had the "injury-plagued" reputation a couple of years ago or else he would be playing in Los Angeles (or not, because Mitch Kupchak is an idiot).

Highlights from last night's games (Davis is #1):


Washington Wizards are winless after losing to the New Jersey Nets. Gilbert Arenas assists/turnovers on the year: 18:21, pass the ball dude.

The Chicago Bulls located their pulse with their first win coming against a good Detroit Pistons team. Hours before someone picks up Tyrus Thomas in my fantasy league after his double-double: 5.

New Orleans will find out tomorrow if they can hang with the big dogs when they face San Antonio. And Kobe Bryant will have someone on the floor who can score, sometimes, with the return of Lamar Odom.

Labels: , , , ,

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Manu Ginoseli

Last night I actually watched the San Antonio Spurs play. And I quickly discovered why I do not watch that team. Booooring. The fact that they were playing Shaquille O'Neal could not get me excited. A Shaq alley-oop got me pumped for a second (I searched YouTube for a video of it, with no success). But then Manu Gi"nose"li flopped... on the offensive end. He jumped into Dorell Wright trying to draw the foul on a jump shot, and was thankfully called for an offensive foul.

I had hoped it would be posted on YouTube this morning but it has not surfaced. In my search I found an awesome video of Manu flopping:

Yes, that was Ken Jennings of Jeopardy! fame. I watched that video 30 times in a row.

Happy Thursday. No more scotch for me. Okay, maybe just a little bit.

Labels: , , , , , ,

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

A Day In The Life Of Scott Boras


4:00 - 4:40 a.m. - Wake up, smile about the dream of a glistening Alex Rodriguez dancing in the rain. Go for a run along the beach of Newport then take dip in the ocean.

5:00 - 5:30 a.m. - Roll around in piles of money on a bed, chanting A-Rod, Barry Zito, and J.D. Drew.

6:35 - 7:35 a.m. - Workout with A-Rod. Translation: watch A-Rod work out, advise him to take off his shirt, and compliment him until his cheeks are rosy.

8:00 - 9:00 a.m. - Offer a shower to A-Rod, that he unfortunately turns down. Apparently, he has his own shower. Take a lonely shower, but call A-Rod while in the shower to tell him something that you "forgot" to say to him.

9:30 - 10:30 a.m. - Have a boring breakfast with wife, Jeanette, but talk about how getting A-Rod $400 million is definitely possible because of what I got J.D. Drew from the Red Sox. "Where is my money for my time with you woman?"

11:00 - 11:30 a.m. - Talk to the Dodgers and let them know they are screwed if they do not sign A-Rod. Insist that the Angels will sign him if they do not get him. Warn that the Angels will be the Los Angeles team.

12:30 - 1:00 p.m. - Talk to Arte Moreno of the Angels and let him know that the Dodgers are really interested in A-Rod. Let Moreno know that not signing A-Rod means dropping the Los Angeles from the Angels name.

1:00 - 1:15 p.m. - Console Moreno about how his team is Los Angeles because of his billboards. But remind him that the Dodgers win the battle of LA if they get A-Rod.

1:20 - 2:20 p.m. - Listen to Brian Cashman apologize for George Steinbrenner's sons. Demand a $400 million contract for embarrassing you and A-Rod. Listen to Cashman cry, and record the whole thing.

2:30 - 3:00 p.m. - Listen to the Cashman tape with A-Rod and take a dip into spa filled with money. Let evil cackles ensue.

3:15 - 4:00 p.m. - Call Omar Minaya and warn him that a deal is almost already done with the Angels/Dodgers.

4:10 - 4:30 p.m. - Call J.D. Drew and demand to have the World Series championship ring. Who else could have pulled off that deal to the Red Sox? Huh "DL" Drew?

4:40 - 5:30 p.m. - Have a snack with A-Rod and crank call Derek Jeter using a voice disguiser and proclaim that A-Rod is a better shortstop. Then tell Jeter that Cashman plans to trade him to the Dodgers. Laugh asses off when you hear Jeter crying with joy, and say, "yeah right you pretty boy! Torre does not want your ass!"

5:45 - 6:15 p.m. - Call Red Sox GM Theo Epstein and remind him of Mike Lowell's home/road splits from last year. Tell Epstein that he is just a "young punk" that A-Rod can beat up. End conversation by yelling: "You do not want A-Rod?!?! Well, I screwed you with Drew and Daisuke Matsuzaka!"

6:30 - 7:00 p.m. - Set dinner meetings with Dodgers' Ned Colletti and Tony Reagins for 9:00 p.m. tonight at different restaurants.

7:15 - 8:00 p.m. - Ignore calls from Barry Zito, Carlos Beltran, and Johnny Damon. Respond to each via text: "I got you your money, and you got me mine. Call me when your contract is up, then we will do work. Right now, I have bigger fish to fry."

8:10 - 8:50 p.m. - Practice Japanese to talk to Dice-K. Today's focus: "We need more money from the Red Sox."

9:00 - 11:00 p.m. - Stiff both Colletti and Reagins. Send a text letting both know that you with are with the other Los Angeles baseball team's GM. Go out to a candlelit dinner with A-Rod in Newport instead.

11:15 - 12:00 a.m. - Invite A-Rod inside for after-dinner drinks to no avail. Say goodbye and curse A-Rod's wife's name in vain. Immediately call J.D. Drew to let him know the ring will be property of Boras, or else. Call a hit man on three-way to reiterate the danger Drew will be in if he does not comply.

12:30 - 1:00 a.m. - Call "Jacob the Jeweler" to inquire about getting a World Series championship ring changed from the "Red Sox" to "A-Rod's".

1:15 a.m. - Sleep time. Say goodnight to wife Alex Jeanette.

Labels: , , , , ,

The Art of Flopping

I do not understand why soccer players flop like crazy. I did not do it was as a kid, nor did my trainers/coaches teach us how to flop. Where do they pick up the techniques and when to flop?

Anyway, some players jump at the opportunity to showcase their acting skills. Take this video for example. It is a freak accident in a South African soccer match in which advertisement boards fly across the field. Yes, I saw a couple players that were hit, but there were double the amount of players on the ground who were not hit.

See for yourself:


How embarrassing... you are a grown ass man and rolling around acting like you are hurt. How the hell do professional soccer players get such hot women?

Labels: , , , ,

WNBA's Savior


Now this would give me a reason to watch the WNBA on a nightly basis. Dennis Rodman is seeking to become a WNBA head coach (no word yet on whether he will wear a sports bra).

Rodman is ready for the next challenge in his life.
"Any of my teammates can tell you that my knowledge of the game is
second to none. My team would learn the skills that made me the player that
will send me to the Hall of Fame. Our players would be in top physical
condition. We would lead the league in rebounding, have a defensive-minded
identity, and we'd run the triangle offense."

I always liked Rodman, antics and all, he was a hard worker on the hardwood floor in the NBA. I think this would be perfect for the WNBA. It would really make me watch the games in which his team was involved in.

Michael Cooper is an all-time favorite Laker of mine, but he could not get me to watch when he was with the Los Angeles Sparks. Bill Laimbeer is someone I hate because he was with the Detroit Pistons, and punked Kurt Rambis in a game; not going to get me to watch.

But Rodman, that is a different story. Imagine Rodman doing the Phil Jackson whistle and putting up the triangle sign with his hands? Classic. I believe him, I think he would get a team to buy into what he has to sell.

The only problem that may arise is him partying with the women after their games, and taking it past the coach-player relationship into the "more than friendly zone."

His manager and agent are scheduled to meet with WNBA teams.

WNBA Commissioner Donna Orender better get on the horn with the teams with coaching vacancies and give them ultimatums: "You hire Rodman, or I will bring referee Tim Donaghy into our league."

(Side note - you know it is sad when I Google "WNBA Commissioner" and this comes up: "Did you mean: nba commissioner". Ouch.)

Labels: , , , , ,

Happy Hump Day


Today is Wednesday, and you know what that means... people in your office are wishing you a "happy hump day" in honor of being halfway through the week.

This edition of a beautiful sports wife/girlfriend brings us Gisele Bundchen, Victoria's Secret supermodel and Tom Brady's current main squeeze.

I need to somehow find a way to break up their relationship because Brady has been on a tear this year with her being his girlfriend. And who could blame him, I would be ripping everyone apart as well to impress this lady.

Damn I hate Brady.

Click here for the unedited and "not safe for work" edition of the picture.

(*I know the paragraph layout sucks on this entry, but you are thinking about the wrongs things if that is on your mind*)

Labels: , , , ,

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Kobe Buying Michael Jordan's House?


Last week a Kobe Bryant fan told me that Kobe is sad because John Paxson said the Chicago Bulls would not trade for Bryant.

I told the fan that Paxson said that to keep his players from tanking in the beginning of the season. All may be quiet regarding Bryant-trade rumors, but Kobe of all people may have a better outlook on things.

Especially if he is looking to buy a new house, outside of California during the season.

Bryant is reportedly in the market to buy Michael Jordan's home in Highland Park , which is about 26 miles from Chicago.
Sneed hears Bryant may be purchasing basketball legend Michael Jordan's massive home in Highland Park. The real estate rumor mill is grinding out grist that could add more credence to the word the L.A. Lakers superstar may wind up playing in Chicago.

The Bulls poor play to begin the season shows that the Bulls players have the possible Bryant trade on their minds. If Paxson wants to deal for Bryant he better do it before his players blow the season for him.

Perhaps Bryant is just getting prepared to opt-out of his contract with the Lakers prior to the 2009-2010 season, or maybe he is going to become a part-owner of the Chicago Cubs.

The rumor of him buying the house may not mean much is what I am saying, but I like to stir the pot.

Labels: , , , , ,

Gold Glove Winners


MLB announced the Rawlings Gold Glove winners today, and it included Los Angeles Angels SS Orlando Cabrera.

Here is the complete list of the winners:
AL
P Johan Santana
C Ivan Rodriguez
1B Kevin Youkilis
2B Placido Polanco
SS Orlando Cabrera
3B Adrian Beltre
OF Torii Hunter
Grady Sizemore
Ichiro Suzuki

NL
P Greg Maddux
C Russell Martin
1B Derrek Lee
2B Orlando Hudson
SS Jimmy Rollins
3B David Wright
OF Carlos Beltran
Andruw Jones
Aaron Rowand*
Jeff Francoeur*
(*Tied in outfield voting)

For Maddux, it was his record-setting 17th Gold Glove award in his stellar career.

I am glad Cabrera got the recognition for the second time in his career. Playing in the AL, voters tend to go with Derek Jeter even though Cabrera puts up better fielding percentage numbers. The voters seem to be in love with the "highlight" plays rather than the consistency.

Now if we could only get a re-vote for the 2007 MLB all-star game... OC deserved to play in the Midsummer Classic this past season.

Tim McCarver is heard to be locked in his own room with Jason Varitek's picture in his arms. Damn, I could not keep count of the times that I wanted to shoot myself because of McCarver gushing about Varitek during the playoff coverage on Fox.

Labels: , , ,

Miami Dolphins: You Are Dead Week 16


I think Don Shula has made sure that we will see the first 100-point game by an NFL team this year. Shula stated that this New England Patriots team should have an asterisk next to their season if they go undefeated this season.
"The Spygate thing has diminished what they've accomplished. You would hate to have that attached to your accomplishments. They've got it," Shula told the Daily News yesterday. "Belichick was fined $500,000, the team was fined $250,00 and they lost a first-round draft choice. That tells you the seriousness or significance of what they found."

"I guess you got the same thing as putting an asterisk by Barry Bonds' home run record."

Oh snap. Great, another way for the Patriots to motivate themselves. Damn you Colts! You had the game in hand, lost, and now the Patriots just got more motivation to tear the NFL a new one.

Dolphins are dead when they meet the Pats in week 16 in Foxboro. You know Bill Belichick is going to make sure Tom Brady hangs a 100-spot on the Dolphins to spite Shula.

Shula should have kept his mouth shut if he wanted to keep his record intact of having the only undefeated team. If the Patriots go undefeated I say the 1972 Dolphins squad (the perfect season team) gather up rats and throw them in Shula's restaurant.

He also went on to say that he might seek those to support his thoughts.
Told that he might get support in his desire to have an asterisk placed next to New England's potential perfect season, Shula, the winningest coach in NFL history, said, "I don't know how people can't agree with that."

"Oh snap!" indeed.

Labels: , , , , , , ,

Destroying Season Tickets

Remember the video I posted and linked to regarding the Arkansas Razorbacks season ticket holder?

He has posted a new video of him taking care of his season tickets to Razorbacks football in a protest of their coach, Houston Nutt.



This one is the best of the four videos so far. To see the others on the original post, click here.

Labels: , , , ,

Flip "Flop" Hooray

Ho! Flopping in sports can be funny. I hated when Vlade Divac did it against the Lakers. I despise it when Manu "Big Nose" Ginobili does it against any team. I love it when a soccer player goes over the top with their acting skills. I hate it when that same soccer player gets carried off on a stretcher, then jumps back onto his feet when they are about to leave the field.

This is my boy Baron Davis. Ex-UCLA Bruin, current baller, Los Angeles loved. He can dunk in Andre Kirilenko's face, but for some reason, cannot take a touch from Mehmet Okur.

Hollywood represent. Seems like his actor and actress friends have rubbed off on him.

Mark my words, next time I am in a soccer/basketball league, I am going to flop like crazy.

Labels: , , , , , ,

The Beginning


Although it is not the Mitchell Report that is due out this offseason, there were three names in a report today that has them linked to steroids that they purchased from the Palm Beach Rejuvenation Center in Florida.

Two were former players, Matt Williams and Ismael Valdez, with the other being a current player in Jose Guillen. Just goes to show you that you never who is on the stuff. Williams and Valdez I did not follow much, but did not expect to hear that Williams was using performance-enhancing drugs.
Citing business records, the Chronicle reported Guillen, who played for the Seattle Mariners last season, bought more than $19,000 worth of drugs from the Palm Beach Rejuvenation Center between May 2002 and June 2005. Guillen had some of the shipment sent to the Oakland Coliseum during the 2003 season, after he was traded to the A's.

Now Guillen on the other hand... I followed this guy because he is a crazy. He was with the Los Angeles Angels in 2004 and was quite a ball player, but was a firecracker waiting to explode. No wonder he would go into psycho-mode anytime the opportunity arose. He has a huge grudge with the Angels and it becomes personal anytime he faces his old squad. Every year it is guaranteed that there will be benches cleared whenever Guillen faces his old team, no matter who he is playing with.

This disturbs me because he was around Angels players and may have provided them with steroids. Dude has balls, getting them delivered straight to the Oakland Coliseum?!?! That is insane.

Sad, sad for baseball. This George Mitchell's Report is going to be nuts. Does it bother anyone else that Mitchell is a Boston Red Sox director? He might leave off Red Sox players from the report in the best interest of the team. God, I hate Boston. More proof that they are the new "Evil Empire" of MLB.

Labels: , , , , ,

Monday, November 5, 2007

Week 9 Is Over


NFL week 9 ended today in an anti-clamatic contest to follow up the huge Colts-Pats contest.

It lived up to the hype. The Colts played like the defending Super Bowl champs for 52 minutes, then decided to give the game away in the final eight. To the Patriots credit they earned the victory by coming back from 10 points down on the road and against the Colts.

Colts receivers made uncharacteristic mistakes by dropping passes. Two that were huge. One by Tony Gonzalez in the end zone, and another with Reggie Wayne beating two defenders and letting the ball slip through his hands in what would have been a touchdown.

They also settled for field goals early in the game when they reached the red zone. Not going to get the "W" against a team like the Patriots when you let your opportunities slip away. I knew the Colts had a chance to win this game before it started and I was proved right.

The Colts defense held the Pats receivers in check for 52 minutes before letting Tom Brady dissect the backfield.

Tony Dungy and the Colts had this game in hand, but let the Pats take it from them. Good thing they will not meet again until January in the AFC Championship game because I think I would flip too many people out by my screaming and antics.

I wore myself out watching this game and ended up passed out on my little cousin's bed snoring my head off.

The consolation that I can take from this loss is that I had $50 on the Colts (+5) and walked away a little richer.

Quick hits on the rest of the games:
Donovan McNabb got the ball to Brian Westbrook a lot in their loss to Dallas, screw Tony Romo. LaMont Jordan is killing my fantasy team and will be cut after rushing for 10 yards in the Raiders loss to the Texans. Browns are 5-3 after downing the Seahawks on a game-winning FG in overtime. The Bucs shot some Cardinals. Jets fans should stop watching this season after blowing another game in an OT loss to the Redskins. New Orleans made me look foolish by saying that the Jaguars could slow down their offense. Adrian Peterson set an NFL record for single-game rushing yards in a game in the Vikings win over the Chargers, ouch (he was seen walking on water after the game). Brett Favre continues to make me watch Packers games as he looked like a 21-year-old in their win over the Chiefs. The Titans continue to stay right behind the Colts after winning at home versus Carolina. Lions are 6-2, let me say that again, the Detroit Lions are 6-2 after dominating the Broncos. Bengals continue to underachieve after losing to the Bills. The Falcons won this week's suck fest by beating the 49ers.

And you may already know by now, but the Steelers tore up the Ravens tonight. Ben Roethlisburlaksjfaer threw 5 TDs in the first half in the 38-7 victory. Their defense was stellar tonight, with James Harrison shining bright in front of the 75th anniversary players who were in attendance.

Sunday cannot come quick enough for me, as I will be attending my first NFL game to see the Colts take on the Chargers.

This week's record: 7-7
Overall record since week 3: 58-40

Labels: , , , , , ,

What The Hell? (Gross Edition)


Weird sports-related stories are always fun to find, and sometimes they gross you out, make you laugh, or just say to yourself, "what the f**k?".

This story comes from NC State and two teammates from the tennis team.

A 19-year-old tennis player, Dejon Bivens, attended an off-campus party at one of his teammate's apartments last weekend. One of his teammates went to bed at 3 a.m., only to be woken up two hours later from Bivens performing oral sex on him.

Bivens has been charged with a sex crime.
None of the tennis team members or the coach will comment on the incident though they know about the charges against Bivens.

N.C. State Athletics officials said they can't comment on the matter because of privacy laws, but as of now, Bivens' status with the team has not changed.

This story is bizarre, gross, and creepy at the same time. I told my friend about this story on Saturday while we were enjoying some post-skateboarding nourishment, and had this to say to me: "Why did you just tell me that story? That is nasty."

I really do not have more to add. This is just a head-shaker story. I would comment on what I would have done had I gotten that wake-up call, but do not even want to think about that.

*The picture has nothing to do with the story, but found it when I googled "wtf" and spent the next 20 minutes looking at the images that came up. You should try it, very entertaining. I then added my photoshop skills for you all to enjoy.*

Labels: , , , , ,

Hockey Fight Night

I usually only attend two NHL games in a season. Which is kind of weird because I enjoy going to them.

Anyway, I went to the Anaheim Ducks game last Thursday against the Columbus Blue Jackets, and a couple minutes after my arrival I turned to my cousin and told him I wanted to see a fight. Two minutes later, I got my wish granted.

The following are the videos of the fights from that night:

1. Jared Boll v. Travis Moen

This fight was pretty boring, but does last a long time. I remember yelling "there is not hugging in fighting!", which made the usher laugh.

2. Ole-Kristian Tollefson v. Brad May

May won this one and Tollefson knew it... that is why he had to wuss out and put May on the bench wall. He could have at least pushed him over the wall, then I would have given the fight to Tollefson just for being cool.

3. Jason Chimera v. Shane Hnidy, then everybody v. everybody

There is not clear winner in this one, and they just hug it out in the group brawl. But it does bring back good memories from the Ice Hockey game for Nintendo.

I could not find a video of purely fighting in the game, but you can see a fight from that game in the following video at the 1:16 mark:

(Props to my cousin for remembering the fighting in the game.)

I recommend drinking Coors Light at the Honda Center, they put something extra in the kegs that had me sleeping like a baby that night.

Where have I been today? That to come in my NFL week 9 wrap up.

Labels: , , , ,

Saturday, November 3, 2007

UCLA Bruins Basketball Has Begun


The UCLA Bruins basketball team did work last night, son. Facing a tough Azusa Pacific (kidding), the Bruins squeaked out a 111-61 victory.

Pauley Pavilion was treated to the debut of the next great big man in UCLA history, Kevin Love. The next coming of Bill Walton. The freshman had 15 points and 12 rebounds in 21 minutes of play.

Josh Shipp, the main scoring threat with the departure of Arron Afflalo, had 20 points on 8-for-11 shooting in 22 minutes, while point guard Darren Collison had a game-high 7 assists. The bad part was that Collison suffered a knee injury and will receive an MRI today. There was no swelling after the game so hopefully he will not miss much time.

This Bruins team WILL return to the Final Four this year. Love is going to be huge for the Westwood squad. The kid has been contacting John Wooden for advice and to learn of the most-storied college basketball school.

Hopefully he is not a "one and done" player. The Bruins could dominate college basketball again if he stays at the school for a few seasons.

Labels: , , , ,

Mike D'Antoni Likes To Whine



Throughout the NBA season you will see Mike D'Antoni crying up and down the court. I do not think there is anything worse then seeing that dude whine. Google him, 90% of the images that come up are like the one to the left.

Last night, D'Antoni did not take kindly to Phil Jackson and his timing of calling a timeout. Jackson called a timeout immediately after D'Antoni had, with the Los Angeles Lakers blowing out the Phoenix Suns. D'Antoni went nuts immediately after he called the timeout, and looked like a hyena excited about seeing a lion.

You can read Jacksons lips in the following video, "what the f**k is wrong with you? Go sit down!":

D'Antoni had this to say after the game:
"Yeah, I was pretty upset," D'Antoni said. "I thought he disrespected our players. But he likes to play the mind games and that's fine. He might want to try to do it in playoff time when we bust them every year."

You got some balls D'Antoni... little as they are, you have no room to make such a comment. Every year? I guess two years in a row constitutes "every year". Just how many championships have you won? What is that I hear? Oh that is right, nothing, meaning zero.

If Jackson had the talent you had on your squad he would have already won back-to-back titles. Your players underachieve in the playoffs, and take on the persona of their head coach: whiners. This Lakers team took your team to the brink of elimination, and would have easily defeated you had Kobe Bryant possessed a teammate better than your average gym basketball player.

D'Antoni would not be able to take this Lakers team to the playoffs like Jackson has the past two years.

Jackson had this to say about D'Antoni flipping out:
"He wasn't thinking straight. That's all," Jackson said of D'Antoni. "He'd understand that if he thought about it for a second. I think he thought I was trying to showboat or grandstand. But when you have a mandatory timeout coming in a minute and a half or something like that, just get it out of the way."

You know Jackson was smiling when he said that.

Memo to D'Antoni: you do know you are Mike D'Antoni right? Win something, and then talk.

I think I am going to take back my prediction that the Suns are winning it all this year.

(Side note: I just noticed Lakers assistant coach Frank Hamblem smiling after Jackson tells D'Antoni to sit down. Classic.)

Labels: , , , , , ,